Mobile is a Scourge to Online Video

Apr. 15, 2024 [technology] [proprietary] [phones]

Web video content is gradually being lobotomized. Years ago it was foreseen that vertical video would be ruinous to viewing conditions. But it is not the aspect ratio alone that has sent web video spiraling down the pit of eternal stupidity. The rise of short form videos catering to zoombies with blown out dopamine receptors has accelerated the decay beyond anything I could have imagined. There are a few factors at play in this.

Video Editing on Mobile Environments is Constrained

Linear graphical video editors appear to be absent or impractical on mobile prisons. My observations of mobile-produced edits suggest that mobile zombies are simply offered a select palette of effects that apply in full over the entire video. “Filters”. Among the results are videos which completely remove the original audio to overlay the uploader’s favorite song, an ailment that we had only just recovered from over the last decade and a half (almost as inexcusable as uploading slide shows to Gootube). And videos with distortion effects obscuring the subject or plastered with emoticons and graphics. Fast cuts (technical events, as described in Four Arguments for the Elimination of Television) to retain the viewer’s ADHD attention.

But I suppose my major gripes are with the toxic waste shat out by tiktok. In no particular order;

Photographing something you want to share

Most short form videos do not even merit a visual component at all. So often they consist of somebody filming themselves in a car, delivering a dialogue that could have simply been conveyed as text. Remember, most phone zombies are just reading subs anyway. Or at least they could be conveyed as a voice over. Mostly this seems to serve the newly feminized internet. Narcissists can relish their own image and exploit human psychology to draw greater attention to their otherwise mediocre content.

Why not just refrain from viewing such content?

It is increasingly becoming difficult to avoid this intellectually stunted format. Links that people share being inconspicuous .mp4 files. And, more often, longer form video uploaders are including mobile format clips in their works, instead of chasing down the primary source footage. I do not want to see braindead zoombies talking about a subject matter when that subject matter can instead be viewed directly. So we’ve returned to the same problem that was so prevalent on boomer television news. A steady stream of low quality garbage designed to hold the focus of sub-95 IQ normies.

How do we proceed?

On the technical end, I am investigating the feasibility of using mpv to probe video links for aspect ratio and duration properties from which to automate the blocking of probable mobile videos. Higher effort would be demanded for the writing of a browser extension to do the same in Firefox

On the non-technical, it may be worth considering dropping certain groups and individuals from one’s online regiment. If an acquaintance or familiar uploader is sharing out mobile format trash, it is an indicator that they have surrendured a part of their soul to the botnet, fondling their way through the muck of tiktok and TXitter. Owners of online hangouts might serve their communities well by disincentivising the uploading or sharing of short form videos featuring oversocialized talking heads.

Is the long term outlook abysmal?

Will short form ADHD video retire as it had once done following the era of Vine, a similar affliction of millennial flavored braindeadery? The up and coming generation’s total exclusive usage of mobile devices can be our forecast. The population’s computer literacy is going to plunge to depths never before seen. Likely, we will be left yearning even for the days of the baby boomers, replete with their Nigerian princes and with their twelve rows of freeware toolbars.

The trends are already becoming evident. Short form video is being used in place of web search. Users would rather be spoken to than have to read paragraphs of text. Admittedly, humans are creatures of storytelling around the fire. They would more readily digest a feed of mobile clips ranked accoring to the trove of data assembled about them by the surveillance machine.